Sunday, March 3, 2013

HOLOCAUST STUDY REVEALS NEW INFORMATION-MY GOD, HOW COULD YOU HAVE FAILED SO MISERABLY??

 
I have been hearing that the Holocaust (known also as The Shoah) never happened, it was a hoax, the amount of the people murdered was grossly exaggerated, it is a fantasy created by the Jews, there are "similar holocausts" occurring all the time, and it is all one huge Zionist plot. These are words and statements that are alarmingly increasingly popular in recent years as the "truth".

The passage of time seems to dull the worlds memory and that of the human race about many things, especially when it is considered part of the realm of that which is deemed "over and done with". The world gets tired of hearing, viewing, reading about victims of anything whether it be war crimes, mass shootings, war crime atrocities, injustices, and the struggles of other humans to survive.


The Holocaust happened, a horrific, unbelievable, bestial, organized act of evil joined in by many to deliberately exterminate others simply for their religion or beliefs. Sadly it is not a hoax or an exaggeration of how many innocent souls were murdered by the Nazis, their collaborators, and the cowardly silence, indifference of the rest of the so called "civilized" world.


Keeping all this in mind, it is with great interest that I read today that Researchers from the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum have concluded that over 42,500 Nazi camps and ghettos existed during Hitler's reign of terror between 1933 to 1945.



Perhaps you've heard of Auschwitz or Treblinka Nazi Concentration Camps and their gas chambers with massive ovens to burn the bodies, but probably not the Munchen-Schwabing camp in Germany. It was the smallest slave-labor camp run by the Nazis, with maybe a dozen people there at a time forced into manual labor, writes Eric Lichtblau in the New York Times.

Researchers at the The U.S. Holocaust Museum say it's now becoming clear that such facilities were far more prevalent than thought in Germany and throughout Europe during the war. They've identified 42,500 of various sizes, about six times the number they expected to find. The sites ranged from killing centers, to brothels, to ghettos, to labor camps. The Holocaust Museum team also created maps of the sites, which were scattered across Europe.

“Nobody even knows about these places,” says one survivor of five lesser-known camps, who now volunteers at the museum. “Everything should be documented. That’s very important. We try to tell the youngsters so that they know, and they’ll remember.”

Hartmut Berghoff, director of the German Historical Institute, said the research is simply astounding, reports The Times. "We knew before how horrible life in the camps and ghettos was," he said, "but the numbers are unbelievable."

The researchers' work may also help Holocaust survivors attempting to sue insurance companies or recover stolen property."How many claims have been rejected because the victims were in a camp that we didn't even know about?" said Sam Dubbin, a lawyer who represents survivors.


The total is far higher than most historians had previously estimated, according to The New York Times. Geoffrey Megargee and Martin Dean, the lead editors of the project, have compiled the thousands of sites in a multi volume encyclopedia that is being published by the Holocaust Museum. 

Each volume catalogs thousands of sites, providing a comprehensive history of the "living and working conditions, activities of the Jewish councils, Jewish responses to persecution, demographic changes, and details of the liquidation of the ghettos.

Megargee and Dean, estimate that 15 million to 20 million people died or were imprisoned in the sites that they have identified as part of this multi volume encyclopedia. (The Holocaust museum has published the first two, with five more planned by 2025.)

The truth is that the holocaust was the systematic annihilation of at least, if not more than six million Jews during the Nazi genocide. In 1933 nine million Jews lived in the 21 countries of Europe that would be occupied by Nazi Germany during World War 2. By 1945 two out of every three European Jews had been murdered.

While the term Holocaust victims generally refers to Jews, the Nazis also persecuted and killed millions of members of other groups they considered inferior (Untermenschen), undesirable or dangerous.


The United States Holocaust Memorial Museum (USHMM) states: “The Holocaust was the murder of six million Jews and millions of others by the Nazis and their collaborators during World War II."[1]

Israel's official memorial to the Jewish victims of the Holocaust, established in 1953 is called Yad Vashem
 
Yad Vashem is located on the western slope of Mount Herzl on the Mount of Remembrance in Jerusalem, 804 meters (2,638 ft) above sea level and adjacent to the Jerusalem Forest. Yad Vashem is a 180-dunam (180,000 m2; 1,900,000 sq ft) complex containing the Holocaust History Museum, memorial sites such as the Children's Memorial and the Hall of Remembrance, The Museum of Holocaust Art, sculptures, outdoor commemorative sites such as the Valley of the Communities, a synagogue, archives, a research institute, library, publishing house and an educational center, The International School for Holocaust Studies. Yad Vashem honors non-Jews who saved Jews during the Holocaust, at personal risk, as the Righteous Among the Nations.

In addition to Jews, the targeted groups included Poles (of whom 2.5 million gentile Poles were killed) and some other Slavic peoples; Soviets (particularly prisoners of war); Romanies (also known as Gypsies) and others who did not belong to the "Aryan race"; the mentally ill, the deaf, the physically disabled and mentally retarded; homosexual and transsexual people; political opponents such as social democrats and socialists; and religious dissidents, i.e. members of Jehovah's Witnesses.[2][3]

Taking into account all of the victims of Nazi persecution, they systematically killed an estimated six million Jews and mass murdered an additional eleven million people during the war. Donald Niewyk suggests that the broadest definition, including Soviet civilian deaths would produce a staggering, unimaginable death toll of 17 million human beings.[4]

Despite often widely varying treatment (some groups were actively targeted for genocide, while others were mostly not), it didn't matter in the end.

These victims all perished alongside one another, some in concentration camps such as Dachau, some as victims of other forms of Nazi brutality, but most in death camps, such as Auschwitz, according to the extensive documentation left behind by the Nazis themselves (both written and photographed), eyewitness testimony (by survivors, perpetrators, and bystanders) and the statistical records of the various countries under occupation.

The number of children killed by the Nazis is approximately 1.5 million murdered children during the Holocaust. This horrific figure includes more than 1.2 million Jewish children, tens of thousands of Gypsy children and thousands of institutionalized "defective" handicapped children of all religions.

Small Boy Captured
During the April-May 1943 Warsaw Revolt


To the Little Polish Boy Standing With His Arms Up

I.
I would like to be an artist
So I could make a Painting of you
Little Polish Boy
Standing with your Little hat on your head
The Star of David on your coat
Standing in the ghetto with your arms up as many Nazi machine guns pointing at you
I would make a monument of you and the world who said nothing
I would like to be a composer so I could write a concerto of you
Little Polish Boy
Standing with your Little hat on your head
The Star of David on your coat Standing in the ghetto with your arms up as many Nazi machine guns pointing at you
I would write a concerto of you and the world who said nothing
.


 
II.
I am not an artist
But my mind had painted
a painting of you
Ten Million Miles High is the Painting
so the whole universe can see you Now
Little Polish Boy
Standing with your Little hat
on your head
The Star of David
on your coat
Standing in the ghetto with your arms up as many Nazi machine guns pointing at you
And the World who said nothing
I'll make this painting so bright
that it will blind the eyes
of the world who saw nothing
Ten billion miles high will be the monument
so the whole universe can remember of you
Little Polish Boy
Standing with your Little hat
on your head
The Star of David
on your coat
.
III.
Standing in the ghetto
with your arms up
as many Nazi machine guns pointing at you
And the monument will tremble so the blind world
Now will know
What fear is in the darkness
The world
Who said nothing
I am not a composer
but I will write a composition
for five trillion trumpets
so it will blast the ear drums
of this world
The world's
Who heard nothing
I
am
Sorry
that
It was you
and
Not me
.
(Poem by Peter L. Fischl) from the Archives of the Simon Wiesenthal Center, Los Angeles, California, USA) 

The Germans kept meticulous, minute, detailed records, documenting every aspect of their systematic progress in annihilating the Jewish people and other non Aryan humans.  

No matter how someone tries to twist it, the facts say it all, but lies repeated often enough are believed by those who don't know the truth. The current sanitizing, minimizing of what actually happened during the Holocaust unfortunately becomes less real as the years go by, and the remaining Survivors, witnesses die.

This latest Holocaust research is yet another piece of evidence that can be used to refute the fringe movement that continues to deny the Holocaust took place, or that its terrible legacy has been exaggerated for political gain.

When Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces during WWII, General Dwight Eisenhower found the victims of the death camps, he ordered that all possible photographs and films be taken of the horrors he found. He did this because “somewhere down the road of history some bastard will get up and say that this never happened”. 

That time in history began immediately after the war ended, the bastards are many.

According to Bernard Lewis, the three most common positions on the historicity of the Holocaust are: "it never happened; it was greatly exaggerated; the Jews deserved it anyway. On the last point, some more enterprising writers add a rebuke to Hitler for not having finished the job."[103]

In European schools, colleges and universities, the schools’ study program no longer list the Holocaust as part of the curriculum and members of the United Nations sit in rapt attention as Mahumud Ahmadinijad, the Iranian President and Holocaust denier stands on the podium bellowing his call for another genocide. A chorus of enthusiastic applause rises from the stands as the Jew hater concludes his harangue. Hitler has risen again and the world applauds.
   
In many Muslim countries the denial of the Holocaust has become an obsession and an art of erasing the story of Nazi evil against the Jews as part of their hatred of Israel. Plays, shows, books and publications spew the lie that the Holocaust was a myth, a story fabricated by the Jews in order to extract money and influence.

Denials of the Holocaust have also been regularly promoted in the United States and all over the world by a wide array of anti Semitic hate groups, pro Palestinian propaganda, educational revisionists in Universities, all kinds of people again looking for someone innocent to blame for their own problems.
                 
Catholic Clergy and Nazi officials (See below), including Joseph Goebbels (far right) and Wilhelm Frick (second from right), give the Nazi salute. Germany, date uncertain.
— Bayerische Staatsbibliothek
                












--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Dead men will have indeed died 
in vain if live men refuse to 
look at them."  

A MASS GRAVE IN THE 
BERGEN-BELSEN 
GERMAN CONCENTRATION 
CAMP

Corpses at Dachau Concentration 
Camp

Majdanek German Concentration 
Camp-
Lublin Poland-Crematorium
Majdanek German Concentration 
Camp-
Lublin Poland-Crematorium Ovens



MY GREAT GRANDPARENTS AND 
CHILDREN-ALL HOLOCAUST 
VICTIMS MURDERED 
IN PONARY FOREST BY THE NAZIS 
AND COLLABORATOR  NEIGHBORS 
FROM THE TOWN THEY LIVED IN.


The above photo is a poster that 
our family circulated in local 
European newspapers looking for 
two children Gisia and Luba 
from our family that were thought 
to possibly have survived. 
There were never any replies.

I do not know what happened to 

my family from my grandfather's side, 
except that they 
were all murdered in the Holocaust, 
disappearing as if they 
never were alive. 

I do know a few things about some 
of my family 
from my grandmother's side, that 
were researched extensively 
by my uncle Joey. 

My great grandparents and some 
of their children 
(in the photos above) lived in 
Vilnius Lithuania, 
they were farmers. 

Over the course of the summer 
in 1941, German troops and 
Lithuanian collaborators killed 
in a mass extermination 
program the entire 
Jewish population of Vilnius. 

On the eve of the Holocaust 
there were
more than 60,000 and within a year 
it was reduced 
to zero, except for a few hundred 
that escaped
to fight with Soviet partisans.

An eye witness from the village kept 
a diary of all the things he saw 
during this time 
in the Vilnius area. 

He was a journalist by the 
name of Kazimierz Sakowicz 
and the diary was eventually 
published as the 
"Ponary Diary-1941-1943-
A Bystanders Account 
of a Mass Murder 
(Yale University Press,
December 2005).

This is what happened to my 
family members. 
On November 19, 1941, 
several hundred Jews 
were rounded up in Vilnius 
by the 
local police 
and collaborators. 
Included in this group of Jews 
were my family members 
shown above in the photos. 

"They were taken to Ponary Forest, 

a suburb of Vilnius.There was only a 
small supply of bullets, 
so the little babies were taken 
from their mothers, 
some still suckling at their 
mother's breast, 
and killed with rifle butts 
by smashing their heads 
until they were dead. 

The rest of the people were then 
rushed by the smashing of rifle butts 
against them 
and pushed into a freshly dug, 
open large pit.

The local police, 
several Nazi soldiers, 
and local villagers standing 
above the pit, 
then shot the people who were 
lying in the hole. 

A man in the pit resists, 
says something 
and points to the children 
next to him, 
they are all immediately shot. 

A mother goes alone 
to the edge of the pit, 
followed by a teenage girl 
in a red sweater shouting "mama". 
A German soldier kills both of them 
instantly with 2 rifle shots".

The remaining Jews in the hole
are then killed, 
buried together in a mass grave
as if they never existed, never were 
human beings, 
and as if this atrocity 
never happened. 

Somewhere in that unmarked 
mass grave 
are members of my family 
murdered that 
day in this massacre.

Over the last 70 years 
the Holocaust 
has been memorialized, theorized, 
condemned, denied, 
revised, but its sheer scale of 
how many people 
were exterminated defies 
ones imagination, 
thereby threatening to turn it 
into an abstract,
less horrifying catastrophe.

The human mind resists 
visualizing the above atrocities 
and the extermination of 6 million 
Jews 
plus another 14 million  
people considered by the Nazis 
as "unfit" to live, 
for an unthinkable 
total of 20 million people 
exterminated.

How does one put that 
number into perspective 
and grasp the meaning of 
how large a
number 20 million human lives 
is in reality? 

All of these dead, never to 
live again, 
never to have families, 
future generations 
never to be born, aspirations never 
to be realized, 
dead forever. 

How does one explain why many 

god fearing, 
deeply religious people participated 
willingly in the
murder of other human beings
or simply ignored it?


Jewish Children marching 
unknowingly
to their death towards the 
gas chamber 
at Birkenau (Auschwitz II).


Starving Children in Concentration 
Camp-Too weak to work
 and exterminated shortly 
after by the Nazis


My God, How Could You Have Failed    
So Miserably?


 In 1945, General Dwight D. Eisenhower, Supreme Allied Commander, anticipated that someday an attempt would be made to recharacterize the Nazi crimes as propaganda and took steps against it:
"The same day[18] I saw my first horror camp. It was near the town of Gotha. I have never been able to describe my emotional reactions when I first came face to face with indisputable evidence of Nazi brutality and ruthless disregard of every shred of decency. Up to that time I had known about it only generally or through secondary sources. I am certain however, that I have never at any time experienced an equal sense of shock.
I visited every nook and cranny of the camp because I felt it my duty to be in a position from then on to testify at first hand about these things in case there ever grew up at home the belief or assumption that "the stories of Nazi brutality were just propaganda".
Some members of the visiting party were unable to go through with the ordeal. I not only did so but as soon as I returned to Patton's headquarters that evening I sent communications to both Washington and London, urging the two governments to send instantly to Germany a random group of newspaper editors and representative groups from the national legislatures. I felt that the evidence should be immediately placed before the American and the British public in a fashion that would leave no room for cynical doubt."[19]
Eisenhower, upon finding the victims of the death camps, ordered all possible photographs to be taken, and for the German people from surrounding villages to be ushered through the camps and even made to bury the dead. He wrote the following to General Marshall after visiting a German internment camp near Gotha, Germany:
The visual evidence and the verbal testimony of starvation, cruelty and bestiality were so overpowering as to leave me a bit sick. In one room, where they [there] were piled up twenty or thirty naked men, killed by starvation, George Patton would not even enter. He said that he would get sick if he did so. I made the visit deliberately, in order to be in a position to give first-hand evidence of these things if ever, in the future, there develops a tendency to charge these allegations merely to "propaganda."[20]
The list of Holocaust deniers is very, very long and their adherents are far too many. And those who forgive, forget and hide the horror are bound to repeat it.

Already forgotten by many are facts, such as that if not for the genius of fledgling American technology companies such as Innovative Business Machines (IBM) and its subsidiaries, who created a business alliance with the Nazis to sell, install, program the first computers for the Germans in helping them create enabling technologies, step-by-step, from the identification and cataloging of Jewish extermination programs of the 1930s to the Concentration camp selections of the 1940s of who were to be saved and who were to be slaughtered.

If not for the hundreds of millions of dollars in research by pharmaceutical Company's such as Bayer (yes like in Bayer aspirin) into advance nerve agents to render people unconscious in “gas” chambers for easy transport to the ovens, and a long list of other Company's who profited from the Holocaust, then the plan would have been impossible.

But most of all, if not for the willing and complicit support of the allies with the exterminations happening in these death camps, the Nazis managed to kill more innocent people by burning them in the concentration camp ovens in 1944 and 1945 than all the other years combined.

All photos of the camps taken by the allies since early 1940 were classified at the highest level of secrecy. Clear and unmistakable evidence since World War II has emerged that the allied command even went to the extraordinary length of tracking logistical movements and likely process rates of victims by tracking rail movements to the sacrifice camps. 

In the end, they permitted not one single bomb to be dropped on the Nazi Death camps during their construction and while they were in operation.

What should you remember? 

Remember that these were all innocent human victims, with names, faces, just like you. They did nothing to deserve what was done to them

 In the famous Diary of Anne Frank she said
 “If we bear all this suffering and if there are still Jews left, when it is over, then Jews, instead of being doomed, will be held up as an example.”
 
Next time, another mass group or groups of people could be targeted for their complete annihilation. As the late Simon Wiesenthal so eloquently put it, "It is not a written law that the next victims must be Jews."

Remembering the horrors of the Nazi Holocaust and its innocent human victims forever is a lesson, that humanity, at all cost, must always be present, preserved, and remain within us.

Never Again! The famous declaration heard around the world. 

Never again will Jews be herded like cattle, beaten and tortured, starved to death, hanged, shot, gassed and burned to ashes. 

Never again! Will a Holocaust be repeated.

Never again…you say? 

But it never happened. Did it?

Monday, February 18, 2013

DURAND FORD SR.-ANOTHER INNOCENT VICTIM OF STUPIDITY AND INDIFFERENCE

I am contacted by people who want me to write about their personal tragic situations as victims. Everyone wants their nightmare of reality to be told so that others can bear witness to the injustices that have been wrought on them. It is impossible for me to put each of their story's on this Blog but I do answer each of them providing whatever resources I can help with.

Sometimes I receive a particular story that begs to be written and often it is something that the media has either completely ignored or gives it a small space in its format. 

The abnormal has become the new normal, and barely an eyebrow is raised when injustice, even the killing of innocent victims, or some other tragic event takes place. 

Often there is nothing particular uncommon about the horrific callousness, incompetence, killing or just plain cruel indifferent, stupidity on the part of those who practice their evil, as a "normal" example of the manner in which they dispose, like used toilet paper, the lives of innocent victims and their families.

This is one of those stories that show again the ugly reality that has consumed an America without a soul,  where a human life is worthless, compassion no longer exists, and that it is acceptable behavior for most Americans who hide in denial dismissing the horrors of their fellow citizens by thinking, "it only happens to someone else, not me or my loved ones".

It will take you 10 seconds or less to sign this families petition below. Have the common decency to take that time and simply provide some support for what happened to their loved one. If it happened to them, it can also happen to you.

This is about Durand Ford Sr. who died due to "breathing problems" on January 1, 2013. Ford Sr. died 13 days short of his 72nd birthday, according to his obituary in the Washington Post. He was an Air Force veteran and worked as an "advisory neighborhood commissioner" in D.C.'s Ward 7.

Or did Durand Ford Sr. really die because  'It turns out that on New Year's Eve, nearly one third of D.C.'s firefighters called in sick, meaning ambulances sat empty in fire stations".


                
                    REST IN PEACE
                                        
You call an ambulance for an ailing family member. It takes a long time to get there. Your family member dies. You receive a bill for the ambulance. Sound impossible? That’s exactly what happened according to NBC News on Feb. 9.

"Jerry -

This past New Year's Eve was one of the worst nights of my life. That's the night my father died waiting for an ambulance that never came.

Around 1 a.m., my father was having trouble breathing, so I called 911. The nearest fire station is just one mile from our house in DC, at most a 5 minute drive. Firefighters arrived in just ten minutes, but no ambulance. 

I watched my father struggle to stay alive as we waited for Emergency Medical Services. And waited. And waited.
The ambulance that finally came 40 minutes later wasn't even from DC -- it had to come from another state entirely. By the time it arrived, my father was already dead.
So why did my father die waiting for an ambulance when there's a fire station just a mile from our house?  
It turns out that on New Year's Eve, nearly one third of DC's firefighters called in sick, meaning ambulances sat empty in fire stations. 

Long response times are a huge problem for ambulances, firefighters and police in cities all over America. The DC fire department needs to see that it can't just let my father die and then take my family's money.
My father was only 72 years old, a retired Air Force Veteran. He did not have to die on New Year's night. And my family certainly shouldn't be charged money for the reason he did.
Thank you, Durand Ford, Jr. of Washington, D.C."

The records show that the 911 call was made at 1:25 a.m. A fire truck from DC Fire & EMS arrived nine minutes later, but an ambulance was not available. DC fire did not call Prince George’s County for assistance until 1:47 a.m.

An ambulance was dispatched from Oxon Hill, MARYLAND, to Ford’s home in Southeast Washington one minute later. It arrived at 1:58 a.m. Durand Ford Sr. was dead.

Durand Ford Sr. died before the emergency vehicle arrived 33 minutes later, NBC Washington reports. The younger Ford said he was "angry" and "disturbed" over being billed.

Durand Ford Jr., of Washington, D.C., and his family was grieving, now they are seething. Ford has now received a $780.85 bill from District of Columbia Fire & EMS for the ambulance he had called Jan. 1 to treat his father. 


Obviously, there is a major management dysfunction that occurred within the Washington, D.C. Fire and EMS Department. It happens all the time in most cities across America but we just don't hear about it most of the time.

Ironically, as often happens in these situations, there is no management difficulty in billing the victim for the incompetence of the "system" that has harmed them.

It doesn't take much brains to anticipate that emergency workers, as many other types of employees, call in "sick" way above the the average amount during certain holidays, especially New Years Eve, as happened in this case. It happens in Washington, D.C. and other places every year, and extra staff are as a matter of standard operating procedure called in to insure that there is proper coverage.

Everyone has their health care nightmare stories, unfortunately this man lost his life. His son needs to tell this company to go pound sand over their bogus bill.


The above tragedy is a casualty of not caring enough about our own citizens to protect our lives. This is a time in America where our Congress incessantly claims it has no money to fund the crumbling infrastructure we live in and depend on, to save our lives.

At the same time bureaucrats fall all over themselves by using this as an excuse to save money, consolidate services to dangerously low levels, cheat, lie, kill us by indifference, steal, and bull shit their way through not being responsible about their sworn duties to protect the public.

The truth is that charity should start at home. 

Besides the enormous "pork barrel" domestic special interest waste of money that is pocketed by politicians and their cronies, we also have the albatross of Foreign Aid. Sure Foreign Aid is essential if we are to remain a world leader. But there is huge waste and stealing of billions of our dollars by the governments of foreign nations.

The Congressional Research Service released a report last month which shows that in 2010 the U.S. handed out a total of $1.4bn to 16 foreign countries that held at least $10bn in Treasury securities.

Four countries in the world's top 10 richest received foreign aid last year with China receiving $27.2m, India $126.6m, Brazil $25m, and Russia $71.5m.

Mexico also received $316.7m and Egypt $255.7m.

And yet despite the massive outgoings in foreign aid, the receiving countries hold trillions of dollars in U.S. Treasury bonds.

If countries can afford to buy our debt, perhaps they can also afford to fund OUR desperate needs for assistance programs in America so that the United States can have enough funds to help it's own
citizens stay alive.

It's not about blaming Obama care, not about the middle class or the poor in our Country needing to suffer more cuts in the services provided to us, and it is certainly NOT about budget deficits caused by Social Security, Medicare, and other false diversionary reasons that have no credence, except to polarize people.

Your life and those of your loved ones mean absolutely nothing to those in positions of power. Stop being manipulated into believing the horse shit propaganda that you are being fed by the politicians and the phony media talking heads.


Face the FUCKING TRUTH! It's about waste, corruption, and mismanagement by those who pull the strings of our "leaders" to suit their own insatiable, inhuman, financial and political greed. 

Get pissed at them, not each other!



Friday, February 8, 2013

GRIEF DOESN'T HAVE A TIMELINE

This article speaks the truth. Neither attempts to standardize the so-called stages of grief nor construct ("term") limits apply to most people. Each person's grief journey is different and "normal' for their particular situation "You don't get over it. You get through it". Anyone, whether a Professional or lay person who attempts to "judge" or label those who experience grief by intellectual categories, words that tie everything up neatly, does a disservice to those who grieve, by not understanding the permanent forever pain when we lose a loved one, especially a child. 

Grief doesn't have a timeline





"Recently at a cocktail party, I met a woman whose husband had died about four years ago. She mentioned him a lot. Not monologues, but frequent references to him — things he’d said, jokes he’d made, his foibles, his likes and dislikes. Some of it was in the past tense and some in the present. Theirs had been a long marriage — over 30 years — and clearly it was still going on.

Here’s another story. 

A woman I know, also happily married for many decades, was devastated by her husband’s death from cancer. A year later, though still missing her husband, she was surprised to find herself falling deeply in love with an old family friend.

Grief is a lot weirder than we think. It doesn’t follow a logical course or conform to any predictable timetable. Yet we persist in making comments about how other people are doing it. And worse, we are constantly, secretly convinced that because our own grief doesn’t proceed according to our expectations, we must be doing it wrong.

It’s time to get over it. Time to move on. Time to get on with your life. We say these things to and about one another all the time. And we say them to ourselves.

“I don’t seem to be able to get over this,” a friend said of her father’s suicide, which happened just over a year ago.“That’s because it’s so recent,” I said.
She looked relieved — oh, good, someone got it, she wasn’t crazy — and dismayed: She’d been hoping that maybe it would be over soon.

Like a lot of other people, I was appalled when I read about the American Psychiatric Association’s proposal to identify something called “complicated grief disorder” — intense, acute grief that persists for more than about six months after bereavement. The rationale is that since most people get over a death in six months (um, excuse me, but who are these people?), the new diagnosis would allow people who struggle with prolonged grief to get treatment. “Get treatment” presumably means “get insurance to pay for treatment.” Do we really need to pathologize grief and stigmatize mourners in order to pierce the obtuse heart (or heartlessness) of an insurance company?

I asked a psychiatrist to translate the term “intense, acute grief.” He said, “Miss Havisham.” I understood: One end of the spectrum would be someone like the Dickens character, jilted by her fiancé, who spends her life in her tattered, yellowed wedding dress, brooding over the rotten remains of the wedding feast and grieving her lost love by punishing everyone else.

But every grief is different, just as every death and every mourner is different. When my father killed himself in 1991, I sort of kept functioning, and I sort of didn’t. I took care of my son, kept the house going, met my writing deadlines. I also stopped sleeping. I gained 30 pounds. I was numb, and it went on for years. It wouldn’t have helped to be told I had a disorder, or to have what I was feeling labeled as “complicated grief.” I knew damn well it was complicated. I didn’t need anyone judging how long it was taking me to get over it. What I needed was the people — including the psychiatrist — who said, “Of course.”

When my mother died four years ago, after a long illness, the grief was different. It was hard and sad, but it felt straightforward: I missed her.

We shouldn’t pathologize grief; we should let it be whatever it is. I look around at friends who’ve had losses, and I see how long, and how powerfully, many continue to feel grief years later. It doesn’t mean that they’re paralyzed and not going on with their lives. But it does mean that grief can be a continuing presence.

Grief is unpredictable, widely variable, inconsistent. It’s weird because it’s supposed to be weird. We don’t cry when we think we ought to. We keep crying when we think we should be done. We watch the Red Sox game the night after the funeral. We don’t change the sheets for a month. We tell the junk man to take everything. We save an old voice mail for years. 

We get over it when we accept that we’ll never quite get over it. 

 It takes as long as it takes."

Monday, February 4, 2013

AMERICA THE BEAUTIFUL-YOUR AVERAGE AMERICAN OR THE TWILIGHT ZONE?


"You're traveling through another dimension --

A dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind ...

A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination.

That's a sign post up ahead: your next stop: ... the Twilight Zone ???"

... Nahhhh
 
... It's just Wal-Mart! ... The gene pool of our Country meets here daily.

...The Walmartians have landed.
   

Yep, drive the lawn mower into town & save some $$ on gas!
 
  
Apparently the new Snuggie t-shirt is only for the classiest ladies.
  

That reminds me…I need milk.

  
“I’ll teach you to leave me in the hot car…”
  
A little too short…I  I can see your phone number!! hello!!!?

   .
I guess I  could see how someone would get pretty tuckered out throwing down a Big Gulp while walking around in shoes like that. Maybe someone should throw some water on him so he doesn’t dry out.

BETTER:  Is that someone's ass hanging out the front of his shirt?


I personally have never forgotten to put a shirt on before I went to Walmart…I’m just sayin…
  
You just brightened up everyone’s day!
   

Flesh-colored yoga pants…there are some things that just should NOT have been invented!
  
Hey, buddy…yer spell-check isn’t working!

   
It’s obvious that both of these ladies look phenomenal in pink but who would you rather wake up next to?


A little too much flesh...really brings out the color of your gut. 




  
I encourage everyone to bust out their white wardrobes…and MAXIPADS!
  Nothing says summer like an all beef hot dog with ketchup and mustard. 
And hey, remember to stop by the shoe department!  
We all know how much of a sweat you can work up while power shopping,so the sports bra is a fantastic idea. The real issue here is “Who Wears It Better?”

  
Words just don’t fit here!

  
  For those of you keeping score:
Handicapped Sign: 2 -- Idiotic Drivers: 0.


   Shopping at Walmart is so easy a caveman can do it.
 
  
Look at  the luscious boobs on…  OH MY GOD, They are on backwards!

 
  No, I don’t want to go to Grandpa’s house!
 
  
Cool Shorts. Hey it's comfortable.

  
Can someone please explain to me how something like this happens?  
  
   I love her tattooo, don't you!!!!